Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Learning to let go of things from your past

Over at his Tearoom of Despair blog, Temuka Bob writes about how his collection has become an albatross that stops him doing excited things [like emigrating to the Caribbean!]. In Bob's case, that collection is comics. For other blokes, it might be vinyl or football memorabilia or classic car parts or something else. [Men and the collecting tendency, what's that all about?]

My name is David Bishop and I used to be collector. 'Because I might read it one day. Because I might need it one day.' Those two sentences - never spoken out loud, only in my head - saw me dragging an ever growing collection of longboxes around Britain for years. Why? Because I might enjoy them again one day, or need them for research. It was reassuring to have them at hand, even if they went untouched for years.

But when I finished hrill-Power Overload, my magnificent octopus detailing the secret history of iconic British science fiction comic 2000AD, I purged myself of almost every comic I own. A complete set of Dredd Megazines. A strong run of 2000ADs. Thousands of US comics. All sold or - if nobody would buy them - junked. If I buy or receive any new comics, I enjoy them once - and throw them away.

I do still buy the occasional graphic novel, but that's mostly nostalgia taking command of my wallet. As for monthly comics, I'm down to a single, half-empty longbox which only contains issues retained for sentimental reasons. The first comic I ever shoplifted, an issue of Luke Cage Power Man. My first issue of Cerebus, the heartbreakingly poignant #75. The daffy madness of Prez.

Selling or dumping your collection is a wonderfully liberating freedom. You get space back. Your life is no longer dominated by towering stacks of longboxes. You're not living in the past anymore. If you're not already in a relationship [with some long-suffering partner], no collection means you don't have to be embarrassed when you bring someone new home. Sad fact: you can't take it with you.

So here's my suggestion of the day: consider having a purge. Chuck out all the crap in your life that's holding you back. Throw out the past and embrace the future. Free yourself of your collection. Free your mind - and your ass will follow. Onwards!

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Writing somebody else's story or characters

Professional writers more often than not find themselves writing somebody else's story or characters. There seems to be a collective perception that three in five films are adaptations, screenplays based on material from another source - books, plays, graphic novels, computer games, short stories, etc. I don't know how accurate that is, but the adapted screenplay category is always far more competitive at the Oscars.

When it comes to TV drama, the number of writers who only work on their own stories and characters is tiny. Scribes at the start of their careers can expect to pour their creative energies into pre-created shows. Continuing drama gives a lot of writers that vital gateway, a place to hone their skills while learning on the job. Few and far between is the emerging scribe who only writes their own inventions.

Computer games are even more prescriptive. Unless you own the computer or are a senior developer, you'll almost never get to create a game from scratch. Franchises and licensed properties dominate the market, all new games are the rarest of the rare. With millions of pounds and years of development work at stake, few companies will take a punt on your bright idea, no matter how great it might be.

Novels are perhaps the last great bastion of the originating writer, especially near the start of their career. You can invent a world, populate it with your characters and - with talent, luck and persistance - get it published. Your ideas, your tales, the offspring of your imagination all get transmitted direct into the minds of readers via ink on some pieces of dead tree [or pixels on an e-reader screen].

But even in book publishing, there's money to be made writing other people's characters and stories. You can novelise film screenplays or episodes from popular TV series, or create original stories based on characters and concepts from other storytelling media such as computer games, comics, TV dramas or role playing games. For many authors, this route offers their first chance of publication.

So here's a couple of guidelines for how to behave if you find yourself in any of the situations were you're temporary custodian of somebody else's story or characters. First off, don't break them. Best to think of your task as being invited to play with somebody else's toys or to drive their car. You're borrowing this, it's precious to them, so try to treat it with some car, okay?

Secondly, remember who's in charge. You own nothing in this equation, except whatever ideas and characters you've brought to the table. [In some fields, you won't even retain ownership of them - read your contract careful!] You are expendable, an ink-slinger for hire. That means you can be dumped as quickly as you got hired, and it'll probably happen quicker. So don't get too comfortable.

Thirdly, listen and learn. Do a good job and you might be invited back for another play with their toys. Bear in mind what you get out of the deal - payment, experience, a credit and the opportunity to learn. Plus you'll work with or for people who could be helpful to you in future at other places. All of these industries are small and word gets round, so play nice with the other kids.

Last, but certainly not least, respect yourself and your talent. If you feel you're being treated bady or exploited, you can always walk away, Renee. Yes, you may well be sacrificing money and it could lead to bad feelings. But if somebody's treating you like crap, chances are you don't want to work for that person again [or for somebody who employs them]. Take responsibility for yourself. Right - onwards!

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Rant: why is STV run by a bunch of ****s?

Am going to get a bit sweary in this rant, so look away now if you find bad language offensive. Really. Leave this blog. Go elsewhere. Move along, nothing to see. Right, here goes...

Why is STV run by such a sad bunch of fucking useless c***s? Why do they insist on using captive viewers as pawn for their stupid fucking power games with ITV? What purpose does it serve to turn their back on popular and beloved TV dramas series that you can watch anywhere else in the UK?

It started back in March this year when STV opted out of screening the third series of detective drama Lewis. I couldn't understand why the Scottish broadcaster would cease and desist this immensely popular show. So I emailed STV, hoping for news that Lewis would be shown at a later date, at a different time. [This happens with BBC Scotland, which displaces shows in favour of local content. Displaced, but not dismissed.]

Here's what I got back from STV: stv will not be showing the new series of Lewis. Throughout 2009, we plan to opt out of the ITV Network more frequently, taking control of our schedule and introducing more Scottish-produced programmes and acquired series that will hold wide appeal across the country. We will be rolling out more exciting stv programming initiatives in the next few months, which we hope you will enjoy.

Sounds interesting, at least. But the reality's been very different - a handful of local interest documentaries, some tired Scottish films getting their umpteenth repeat - and a load of cheap, imported shite. The America version of Cracker [made in 1997]! Sundry Irish cop dramas, all them at least five years old. And old episodes of South Park, dotted around the schedule like unexpected animal turds.

If it had just been Lewis, I would have huffed and puffed but soon gotten over it. [Each new series of Lewis gets a swift DVD release, so there was hope on the horizon.] But the opt-outs continued, even accelerated. The Bill gets a zingy new look relaunch? Not in areas north of the border served by STV [i.e. nearly all of Scotland]. New episodes of Marple? Nope. The Fixer? Nope. Blue Murder. Nope.

Tonight the new series of Doc Martin launches - but not on STV. Instead we're getting Roman Polanski's film The Pianist. Again. Very fucking Scottish, I'm sure. Plus it's split in half with a news bulletin, because that's always such a popular move with viewers. STV, you c***s. I want my fucking drama back! I want new shows, shows from this decade, at least - not any old shite you pick up cheap.

By now, anybody still reading this rant will be wondering why I don't watch ITV's London feed via Sky. Or Freeview. Or on cable. Because we can't get Sky [thanks to interference from trees over which we have no authority]. Because we can't get the Freeview signal. And cable doesn't extend outside most cities in Scotland. All we get is the FUCKING, COCK-SUCKING SHITE BETTER KNOWN AS S-PISS-T-POOR-V.

I hear the entire STV drama department has been laid off, including the wonderful Eric Coulter. So all that money STV is saving by opting out of ITV network shows? Certainly not being spent on new Scottish drama. You want new TV drama of any kind? Try a DVD instead. Watch the BBC. Watch iPlayer. Just don't bother watching STV. They can't be bothered showing any drama anymore. None worth watching, anyway. C***s.

Saturday, September 19, 2009

One, two and three years onwards

Yesterday completed the first week of actual teaching on the new creative writing MA at Edinburgh Napier University. [Wekk One was all about induction, matriculation and creating some esprit de corps among our first cohort.] Feels like something fried my brain with a little butter and some herbs, plenty a little crushed garlic as well. But now that's done, it's time to get back to my own writing.

This blog is fast approaching its fourth birthday [my, how time flies]. I started it as a way of tracking the progress of my quest to become a screenwriter. The first two years were sometimes dominated by the screenwriting MA I was studying part-time at Napier. This week I've been advising my creative writing students to consider starting their own blogs, as a reality check on their progress and aspirations.

So, what I was doing this time last year? I sent off my entry for the Red Planet Prize, the first ten pages of a WWII home front soap I'd originally developed during my MA. That had a happy outcome, as Families At War was eventually selected as one of the runners-up for the RPP. I was also awaiting notes for a second draft of my Doctor Who audio, Enemy of the Daleks - and that turned out pretty good.

Two years ago? September 2007 saw me finish my screenwriting MA [with Distinction, I later discovered]. A short film script I'd developed on the course won a first prize in that year's Page International Screenwriting Awards. I was racing deadlines to finish my script for the TAPS continuing drama workshop. Plus I was convinced getting an agent was an essential step to progressing my career objectives.

Well, the TAPS script came to nothing. I didn't make the next round, though everyone else I knew at the workshop weekend did [eight of them!]. In truth, I knew my script would never make the cut. It required stunt work, two fights, a stabbing, copious amounts of blood - all things that the filming format for chosen projects precludes. I still like my script, and plan to rewrite it for radio one day.

Didn't get anywhere seeking an agent in 2007 - and it hasn't obviously hurt my career. No doubt there are doors which haven't been open to me, but I'm not sure I was ready for those opportunities anyway. Push is coming to shove on a particular project of mine and I may soon need the sort of advice only an agent can offer. So my quest from 2007 could be revisited before the end of this year.

Two years on from winning a first prize at the Page Awards, DANNY'S TOYS isn't any closer to being made. An Edinburgh animation producer got interested in the project for a while, but development funding wasn't forthcoming so that fell by the wayside. In the meantime I've got another short film script in the finals of this year's Page Awards - winners due to be announced on October 1st.

Three years ago I was eagerly waiting for news from River City about a script sample I'd written for them at the start of September 2006. [Dozens of writers were part of this initiative.] We'd all written our samples over the space of a weekend, and were told feedback would be with us inside a week. It took another year before everyone got rejected. Boy, did that leave a sour taste in the mouth.

I was a year into my screenwriting MA, and starting a madcap year of juggling the degree course, half a dozen different workshops and nine months of being mentored by Adrian Mead. Looking back, I took on waaaaaaaaaaaay too much and some of my work suffered as a consequence. But fast-tracking the learning process has paid off since then, so I guess it was worth the sleepless nights and poverty.

What else was I doing in September 2006? Finishing my first fantasy novel, a police procedural set in Games Workshop's Warhammer universe. I later wrote a second novel wih the same characters, but slight sales mean I'll probably never get to finish the loosely linked trilogy of tales I had planned. Such is life. You don't always have the satisfaction of finishing every story you start writing.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

This, that and a bit of the other. Yes, that one

As a writer, you sometimes have to wonder WTF is going on inside your subconscious. Where do those strange ideas and bizarre moments that creep into your stories come from, hmm? There's no easy answer to that, so it's probably left unasked. I'm just happy ideas come. Figure they're better on the page than festering in my head. [Strange but true: crime writers are the nicest people you'll ever meet.]

Been having some powerful strange dreams of late, but these can throw an occasional story idea out of the slumbering. Stranger still, I woke up with a ditty in my head. David Sylvian's mournful new album must still be exercising my noggin, as this was on my lips where the alarm got me up at 5.45am [to the tune of Daydream Believer by The Monkees, if you feel like singing along]:
Cheer up Sylvian!
Don't you be so glum (you know)
Might never happen, buddy
Worse things at sea
In other news, I've belated discovered my scripts DANNY'S TOYS and THE WOMAN WHO SCREAMED BUTTERFLIES are in the first round of the British Short Screenplay Competition - along with many others. Numerous elimination rounds follow, before the winner's chosen. I'm hopeful for both scripts, as DANNY'S TOYS won another competition two years ago and TWWSB is a finalist in that same contest.

You might wonder why I've entered in the BSSC, since my scripts have already done well elsewhere. Simple: first prize is your story gets made. Winning other script contests is a nice ego boost and can sometimes led to other things, but only the BSSC guarantees your short gets shot. Scripts are written to be filmed, not read. Otherwise your efforts are about as much use as an unridden bicycle.

What else? Delivered another draft of my Doctors script, but it's not done yet. Once this episode gets locked, I'm back to square one in many ways, with no stories in the bank and no guarantees - but that's the nature of the beast. Hopefully my efforts will stand me in good stead, and I will have a first TV drama screenwriting credit to my name. Far from unique, but still a significant step forwards.

Right, enough wittering from me. I've got four thousand words of sample text to finish drafting today, and a local project meeting at 3.45pm that's liable to blow a big, fat hole in the middle of the afternoon, my most productive time of day. Onwards!

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Hot, cool and where's the tune?

Some sage once said jazz comes in three broad categories: hot, cool and where's the tune? I'd argue the same applies to other music. iTunes UK's new additions for this week and there's a decidedly 80s feel. Bananarama are back with hot Hi-NRG disco stompers. Matt Bianco is all bossa-nova cool, while David Sylvian's new album Manafon is defiantly where's-the-tune?

Four tracks in and Manafon sounds more like recitative from the world's most depressing oratorio, or some bloke mumbling over the soundtrack for a Japanese horror film. Much as I enjoy Sylvian's more esoteric wibblings, I can't help pining for the occasional versus and chorus. Guess that's not where his head's at right now. Here's a video for the lead-off track, Small Metal Gods.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Our definitions of Classic TV Drama may differ

Looking for something on amazon.co.uk, I noticed a sidebar in the DVD section headed Classic TV Drama. Everybody's definition of what constitutes classic TV drama is always going to differ, but some of the shows included beggar belief. Have a look at the list and decide how many of these deserve to be called classics:
* All Creatures Great and Small
* Ballykissangel
* Band of Brothers
* Bergerac
* Bonekickers
* Boys from the Blackstuff
* Edge of Darkness
* Howard's Way
* Hustle
* John Le Carre
* Judge John Deed
* Life on Mars
* Singing Detective
* Robin Hood
* Spooks
* This Life
My own list would only include eight of these, and that's being generous in one or two cases. There's a few definite non-starters in my humble opinion [All Creatures Great and Small was entertaining, but classic TV drama?], and one or two suggestions that contradict all known common sense. Car-crash TV drama maybe, but not classic...

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Judge Dredd: Stranger Than Truth

Next month I have a new audio drama out on download or CD from Big Finish Productions, called Stranger Than Truth. It's the first in a run of four Crime Chronicles by various scribes, featuring the future's toughest law enforcer, Judge Dredd. [Dredd appears every week in iconic British science fiction comic anthology 2000 AD.] Here's the official story blurb for this forthcoming release:
Captured and imprisoned by Judge Dredd, author Truman Kaput has spent years in the Mega-City One iso-cubes, his work banned. His crime: writing lurid detective novels in which assassin Slick Dickens repeatedly outwits the cowardly bully Judge Dredd. Now a New Truman Kaput novel is being serialised, and each chapter predicts an imminent murder with chilling accuracy.

Has Slick Dickens escaped the page to commit real crimes in Mega-City One? Is a serial killer using the chapters as templates for their crime? Where does fiction end and the truth start? Can Dredd stop the plot before his nemesis fulfils the finale of Slick Dickens: I Killed Judge Dredd?
I'll talk more about this story in a future blog posting. In the meantime, you can find out more and pre-order Stranger Than Truth.

Tuesday, September 08, 2009

Calm before the storm [except if you're outside]

It's blowing a gale outside, real sideways weather. We're catching the edge of some severe winds, things are worse further north in the Highlands of Scotland. After a particularly pish summer, autumn is waving its hands for attention. Days are getting shorter, it's dark when I get up in the morning and favourite scarves are being dug out of forgotten hiding places. In short: the end of 2009 is nigh.

Right now feels like the calm before the storm. On Thursday the first cohort of MA creative writing students arrives at Edinburgh Napier University, fresh-faced and eager to learn what they don't know and enhance the talents they already have. The past eight months have been a blur of module prep, applicant interviews, plans, dreams and wonderings. Now it's all about to happen.

I've got no idea what impact teaching will have on my writing. There'll be a time crush as I struggle to balance the part-time university job with a career as a working writer. No doubt teaching will be creatively draining, especially mentoring the students on their writing. But it should also be rewarding. There's a claim that those who learn most are the teachers, so I hope to discover plenty.

Been turning down some offers of work to keep my commitments light in the first few months. That goes against the grain after nine years of freelancing, but needs to be done. I took this job to have the financial freedom from writing gigs that paid the bills but didn't feed the soul. If you want to create stories worth telling, you can't take jobs just because they have a four figure sum attached to them.

In other news, the second draft of my Doctors script is under consideration. Notes could turn up at any time, requiring a third draft and fast. The nightmare scenario is the notes arrive on Thursday, about ten minutes after that first cohort of students. All you can do is shrug and get on with things. What will be, will be. [Doris Day I can cope with, just stop that bloody kid from whistling, Hitch.]

Into Glasgow tonight for a Tori Amos concert. This singer-songwriter has a kooky US version of Kate Bush persona. She's been around since the early 90s, going in and out of fashion. Saw her in concert at the Royal Albert Hall once. She played while riding her piano stool side saddle, dry humping the seat into submission. Wonder what she'll do tonight? Knowing Tori Amos, almost anything's possible. Onwards!

Sunday, September 06, 2009

The Hurt Locker: yes, you can believe the hype


Went to see The Hurt Locker yesterday, a film about bomb disposal experts in Iraq. There's been no shortage of films about the conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan, but this is the first one I had any urge to see. Back near the start of this year I gave a lecture about war films to a class of undergrads on an English and Film module. It was researching that which first made me pay attention to The Hurt Locker.

The film was first seen at film festivals last year and got raves. A distributor picked it up for release in US cinemas, despite the fact films dealing with the war in Iraq have been box office poison. Screenwriter Mark Boal was a journalist who'd been embedded with troops in Iraq, which promised a gritty realism not found in a lot of war films. And then there was the director: Kathryn Bigelow.

Female directors don't get much of a shake, particularly in Hollywood. Don't believe me? Try naming five female film directors. Now name another five. If you can name another five, you're either an academic or an utter movie geek. Kathryn Bigelow doesn't make that many films, and she certainly doesn't make chick films or rom-coms. Her movies have got guts in abundance, plus plenty of heart and smarts.

Bigelow's features include influential vampire western Near Dark, the gripping Blue Steel, that kitsch classic Point Break and a film I really must see soon, Strange Days. She's dabbled with TV [if you could call three eps of the excellent Homicide: Life on the Street] dabbling. And she's got one real stinker on her resume, K19: The Widowmaker with Harrison Ford as a Russian sub commander [or some such shite].

The stinker almost killed her career stone dead, so it's brilliant to see her return with a movie as stunning as The Hurt Locker. I won't spoil any part of it for you, except to see you should see it in a cinema. Make the effort. Come Oscar time, this will be in the running for a statue [or several, if there's any justice]. Amazing performance by Jeffrey Renner, too - give that man a golden statue.

Friday, September 04, 2009

Snakes on a cane, and other random stuff

Loving the promo image for the new season of House [its sixth], which kicks off soon across the Atlantic. Been having a season four re-watch on DVD of late and thoroughly enjoying it. The reality show elimination motif adds a lot of fun to the show, helping to alleviate the occasionally formulaic nature of House episode structure. [In short, the patient nearly dies at the end of each act.]

In other news, I finally sent away a short job that's been kicking my arse for far too long. Not that I needed reminding, but I shouldn't take on jobs for which I don't have much enthusiasm - when your heart's not in it, your writing won't have much heart. [Yikes, I sound like the dude from Mystery Men who always talks in riddles. Love that film.] So, yeah, don't take commissions for the sake of it.

What else? Got notes back on the first draft of my Doctors episode. Nothing apocalyptic I'm happy to report [while being careful not to go into any specifics]. Second draft is now submitted. This is the make or break draft, I'm told. Yikes. Will hear back about that in due course. No doubt there'll be a third [and probably a fourth] draft ahead, but I'm learning so much at the same time.

Off to Edinburgh this afternoon to see classmates from the screenwriting MA course I did 2005-2007. Some of them I haven't seen since graduation nearly two years ago. Feels an apt moment for a spot of reliving our student experience, as next Thursday I start teaching a new creative writing MA at Edinburgh Napier University. Call it karma, coming full circle, or whatever. Me, I'm just excited.

Wednesday, September 02, 2009

My short film script is a Page Awards finalist

Happy news late last night: THE WOMAN WHO SCREAMED BUTTERFLIES is a finalist in the 2009 Page International Screenwriting Awards. It's one of the ten contenders in the short film script category. There are ten categories, with a winner and two runners-up to be announced in each section on October 1st. The contest had nearly 4400 entries from 58 countries, so it's nice to be among the top 100 from all of those submissions.

I don't expect ...BUTTERFLIES to win. It's a striking script with a visually arresting element to the layout, but not exactly uplifting, feelgood fun. Even if it does win, the chances of my script getting made are slim. Short films tend to be arthouse efforts aimed at the film festival circuit or stepping stones to longer projects. Guess a director might fall in love with it, but I'm not holding my breath.

Been done this road before. Two years ago my script DANNY'S TOYS won the short film category in the 2007 Page Awards. Got a few reading requests and an Edinburgh producer sounded out Scottish Screen about development funding [without success]. A big strike against DANNY'S TOYS was the fact it had to be animated, meaning a six figure production budget - no easy ask for a short film.

THE WOMAN WHO SCREAMED BUTTERFLIES is contemporary, live action and doesn't feature any children [or clockwork bumblebees] - so it has a fractionally better chance of progressing beyond the script stage. Whatever happens, it's nice to see a project I developed for the BBC Sharps contest last year finding recognition. Keep your fingers crossed for ...BUTTERFLIES on October 1st. In the meantime - onwards!