Bumper posting: Films of Michael Caine

I'm off to visit relatives for the weekend and won't be back until late on Monday, so below you'll find a bumper crop of entries from my book about the films of Michael Caine. The British actor's undergone a remarkable renaissance in the last ten years, when during the mid 90s his career was at one of its lowest ebbs. Personally, I think he was robbed not to get more attention round awards time for his work in Children of Men, but that whole film was criminally under-appreciated, in my humble opinion...

MISS CONGENIALITY (2000)
Cast: Sandra Bullock (Gracie Hart), Michael Caine (Victor Melling), Benjamin Bratt (Eric Matthews), Candice Bergen (Kathy Morningside), William Shatner (Stan Fields), Ernie Hudson (McDonald), John DiResta (Agent Clonsky), Heather Burns (Cheryl “Rhode Island”), Melissa De Sousa (Karen “New York”), Steve Monroe (Frank Tobin), Deirdre Quinn (Mary Jo “Texas”), Wendy Raquel Robinson (Leslie “California”).
Crew: Donald Petrie (director), Sandra Bullock (producer), Marc Lawrence and Katie Ford and Caryn Lucas (writers), Ed Shearmur (music), Laszlo Kovacs (cinematography), Billy Weber (editor), Peter Larkin (production designer).

Synopsis: Gracie Hart is a mannish agent for the FBI. The FBI receives a letter from the Citizen, a domestic terrorist, who threatens to attack the Miss United States beauty pageant in Texas. Gracie is chosen to go undercover as a contestant. The FBI employs a pageant consultant called Victor Melling to make Gracie a credible candidate. She gets a makeover and emerges as a beautiful woman, to the surprise of her boss Eric Matthews. Forensic tests suggest the threatening letter was sent by a woman. Gracie believes the pageant organiser, Kathy Morningside, is involved. But the FBI arrests the real terrorist in Nevada and close down the operation in Texas. Gracie decides to stay at the pageant, believing Kathy is planning a copycat bombing. Gracie realises the bomb is hidden in the winner’s tiara. She throws the tiara into the air just as Kathy detonates the bomb. Afterwards the other contestants give Gracie the title of Miss Congeniality…

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This screwball comedy was created in 1999 as a vehicle for producer/actress Sandra Bullock. Donald Petrie was brought on board as director, having previous helmed hits like Mystic Pizza (1988) and Grumpy Old Men (1993). Caine was hired to play gay beauty pageant consultant Victor Melling soon after receiving his Oscar nomination as best supporting actor for The Cider House Rules (1999). ‘I couldn’t refuse working with Sandra Bullock,’ he told Variety.

In the film’s press book Caine discussed why he accepted the part: ‘What I liked about the role was that it was funny, it was different and it was a comedy. In my most recent films, I played the man who destroyed the Marquis de Sade, an abortionist and a very violent gangster. After reading the script and finding it such a great comedy, it was such a relief. I said, “I’ll do it. I’ll do it. I’ll do it.” I was just dying to get a laugh on set.’

He started work on the $45 million movie in May 2000, soon after finishing his performance as the lead in Shiner (2000). The bulk of Miss Congeniality was shot in Austin, Texas, with brief location work in San Antonio and New York. Caine studied with a Texan pageant expert for his role as Victor and also sought tips from wife Shakira, who came third in the 1967 Miss World contest. The picture reunited Caine with Candice Bergen, with whom he had co-starred more than thirty years earlier in The Magus (1968). The actor predicted significant success for Miss Congeniality. ‘It’s very funny. I think it will be a great vehicle for Sandra,’ he told Variety just before the picture opened.

The film was released across America in December 2000, rated PG-13. Reviews were mixed but Miss Congeniality became a Christmas hit at the box office, grossing more than $105 million – the biggest hit of Caine’s career at that time. This success was echoed around the world. In Britain the 12-rated movie opened in March 2001 and grossed more than $15 million. It was released on video and DVD later in the year. The DVD includes two commentary tracks, deleted scenes and documentaries. In 2002 some entertainment media reported work had already begun on a sequel in which Bullock’s character would use her new-found beauty queen skills to become a model and hunt for a serial killer. Producers were reported to be hopeful of persuading Caine to reprise his role.

Reviews: ‘Miss Congeniality is yet another miscalculated vehicle for the ever-feisty Sandra Bullock … Caine has a fine time as the makeover master even if he’s vastly overqualified for the modest assignment.’ – Variety
‘Gossamer-thin entertainment of the sort that would make for an inoffensive first-date movie. There is a complete inconsequential feel to the whole exercise.’ – Empire

Verdict: Miss Congeniality is a lightweight film that amuses you while its happening, but doesn’t stand up to any scrutiny. The movie wants to have its cake and eat it, scoring laughs from the baroque excesses of beauty pageants while still holding up the contestants as admirable for using their good looks to get ahead. The anorexic plot is just a vehicle for Bullock to exhibit her not inconsiderable comedic skills. Still, everyone hits their marks nicely, with Caine offering a delicate, understated performance as a disappointed gay man. Miss Congeniality is disposable fun – nothing more, nothing less.


LAST ORDERS (2001)
Cast: Michael Caine (Jack), Tom Courtenay (Vic), David Hemmings (Lenny), Bob Hoskins (Ray), Helen Mirren (Amy), Ray Winstone (Vince), J J Field (Young Jack), Cameron Fitch (Young Vic), Nolan Hemmings (Young Lenny), Anatol Yusef (Young Ray), Kelly Reilly (Young Amy), Stephen McCole (Young Vince), George Innes (Bernie).
Crew: Fred Schepisi (director), Elisabeth Robinson (producer), Fred Schepisi (writer), Paul Grabowsky (music), Brian Tufano (cinematography), Kate Williams (editor), Tim Harvey (production designer).

Synopsis: Three old friends meet in a South Londoner pub to remember their late friend Jack. The dead man’s son, Vince, drives the trio to Margate Pier so they can scatter Jack’s ashes. Meanwhile Jack’s widow Amy visits her retarded daughter June for the last time. During the day each person remembers incidents from their past, hidden truths and personal revelations about how they have shaped each other’s lives…

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Graham Swift’s novel Last Orders was first published in 1996 and won the prestigious Booker Prize that year, arguably the highest honour in British fiction. Soon after film producer Elisabeth Robinson showed the book to Australian writer/director Fred Schepisi. The pair persuaded Swift to let them adapt it into a film. Schepisi began writing the screenplay with Swift providing critiques on each successive draft. The project got commitments from actors Caine, Tom Courtenay, Bob Hoskins and Ray Winstone, but it took another two years to raise sufficient finance to begin shooting.

In his DVD commentary, Schepisi remembers offering the key part of Jack to Caine: ‘He said “Oh damn, okay. Yes, I’ve got to do this. I knew I’d be playing my father one day.”’ Caine found himself acting the role of a man dying of cancer at St Thomas’s Hospital – just as his own father had done. There was another strong resonance for the actor. In the film Jack’s wife Amy visits her retarded daughter at a care home once a week for 50 years. Caine’s own mother had given birth to an illegitimate son in the 1920s who suffered from epilepsy. At the time the illness was treated as a form of insanity and the boy spent half a century in an asylum, secretly visited by his mother every week. Caine only learned about his half-brother after their mother had died. ‘It was a very personal reason for him doing this film,’ Schepisi says in the commentary.

The $12 million production was shot over nine weeks from October to December 2000, during the wettest autumn for nearly 250 years. (A pre-shoot had already taken place during summer in Kent for a sequence showing hop-picking.) Filming took place at locations around London and Kent, with studio work at Pinewood and in an unused warehouse in Peckham. Caine was only required for three weeks of the shoot, before flying to the South of France to join the cast of Quicksand (2002). Last Orders reunited him and old friend Bob Hoskins, with whom he had appeared in The Honorary Consul (1983), Sweet Liberty, Mona Lisa (both 1986) and Blue Ice (1992).

In 2002 Caine told the Hollywood Reporter he did low budget projects like Schepisi’s film when he liked them. ‘I was in Last Orders with all my friends. I was only on the picture for 10 days, but I do that – it’s not like the big movie star who doesn’t come out unless it’s a full budget and everything. Apart from being with my friends, a very good script and very good director, there was that thing of getting a British movie off the ground.’

The film received its world premiere at the Toronto Film Festival in September 2001, with a screening at the London Film Festival two months later. Last Orders opened in American cinemas during December 2001, rated R. Many critics gave it strong notices and the picture grossed nearly $2.5 million from a limited release. The cast won the US National Board of Review’s award for best ensemble performance. Last Orders was released to British cinemas in January 2002 with a 15 rating, gathering glowing reviews from critics and grossing $1.3 million. The film was a bigger hit in Australia, taking more than $1.7 million at the box office. Last Orders was issued on DVD and VHS in 2002.

Reviews: ‘Ambitious in structure and casting, it packs a lot into its screen time. Quality craftsmanship for a discerning crowd.’ – Empire
‘Schepisi’s intelligent and thoughtful adaptation ensures that the film works smoothly through a complex series of time shifts, and, though there’s plenty of humour, the film succeeds best on an emotional level.’ – Variety

Verdict: If you want action, adventure and high octane thrills, go elsewhere. If you want a moving, funny and emotionally satisfying film about life, love and friendship, then Last Orders is the picture for you. Schepisi succeeds in adapting a heartfelt, literary novel into a small gem of a movie, his script and direction effortlessly guiding you through a complex interweaving of narratives and flashbacks. Paul Grabowsky contributes a haunting, jazz-tinged score that never overwhelms or overstates, just like the rest of this classy feature. The cast is uniformly excellent, with Caine in fine form as a man facing his own mortality. If you can watch this film without shedding a tear, you must have a heart of stone. Never crass or sentimental, Last Orders is emotionally draining and life affirming at the same time.


AUSTIN POWERS IN GOLDMEMBER (2002)
Cast: Mike Myers (Austin Powers, Dr Evil, Fat Bastard, Goldmember), Beyoncé Knowles (Foxxy Cleopatra), Seth Green (Scott Evil), Michael York (Basil Exposition), Robert Wagner (Number Two), Mindy Sterling (Frau Farbissina), Verne Troyer (Mini-Me), Michael Caine (Nigel Powers), Fred Savage (Number Three), Diane Mizota (Fook Mi), Carrie Ann Inaba (Fook Yu), Nobu Matsuhisa (Mr Roboto).
Crew: Jay Roach (director), John S Lyons, Mike Myers, Eric McLeod, Demi Moore, Jennifer Todd and Suzanne Todd (producers), Mike Myers and Michael McCullers (writers), George S Clinton (music), Peter Deming (cinematography), Jon Poll and Greg Hayden (editors), Rusty Smith (production designer).

Synopsis: Britain secret agent Austin Powers captures his arch-enemy, Dr Evil, who is sentenced to 400 years in prison. Austin gets knighted but his father, super-spy Nigel Powers, misses the ceremony. Soon afterwards Nigel is kidnapped by a Dutch madman called Goldmember and taken to the year 1975. Austin time-travels to 1975 where he teams up with US agent Foxxy Cleopatra. But Goldmember flees to 2002, taking Nigel with him. Dr Evil escapes prison and shifts operations to a submarine off the coast of Japan. Goldmember and Dr Evil join forces, hatching a plan to flood the world unless an enormous ransom is paid. Austin and Foxxy rescue Nigel but Goldmember and Dr Evil escape. Austin and Foxxy infiltrate Dr Evil’s sub. Just as Austin is about to shoot his nemesis, Nigel walks in and reveals that Dr Evil and Austin are brothers. Dr Evil joins the good guys and helps them thwart Goldmember. Dr Evil’s own son Scott runs off, vowing revenge.

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Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery was a minor hit in 1997, before developing a cult following on video. Two years later a sequel, Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me, was a box office smash, grossing more than $200 million in the US. Another sequel was inevitable and work began on the script in March 2001.

Mike Myers wrote a long letter to Caine, asking him to play England’s most famous spy, Nigel Powers. The creation of Austin Powers had been much inspired by Caine films from the 1960s. ‘The very first time I saw Austin Powers,’ Caine told interviewers, ‘I realised Mike had based it on a character I played many years ago. The 1960s, the glasses, and the accent – I knew it was me. Not only was I ideal to play it, I felt I was the only person who could play it.’ The actor accepted the role, having taken several months off after filming his exhausting role in The Quiet American (2002).
Production began in November 2001 and was shot predominantly on studio lots. Advance promotional material announced the film’s title, but this was withdrawn in January 2002 following court action by the owners of another spy character, James Bond. It was alleged that Goldmember was trading on the Bond franchise without permission. The film was temporarily renamed Austin Powers III but the original title was eventually reinstated.

The main cast were encouraged to ad lib during filming, creating considerably more material than required. Director Jay Roach’s first cut lasted three hours – double the length of the final picture. A brief excerpt of Caine from the film Hurry Sundown (1967) appears in the film during a flashback. On the Austin Powers in Goldmember DVD commentary track Roach says the hardest cut was removing a sequence where the main characters sing along with a version of the theme song to Caine’s 1966 film Alfie. ‘We were all sure it was going to be one of the highpoints … the audience just felt it slowed the movie down. We tried it in two previews and the movie took a big dip in momentum. It was brutal to cut something like that.’ The sequence is among more than 20 minutes of deleted scenes and outtakes on the DVD release.

Austin Powers in Goldmember was simultaneously released in the US (rated PG-13) and the UK (PG) on July 26, 2002 – four days after its premiere. The film proved even more successful than its predecessor, grossing $213 million in the US and another $36 million in Britain. Dripping with cameos by famous faces, it featured at least half a dozen Oscar winners amongst the cast. Among those making fleeting appearances was musician Quincy Jones, who provided the music for The Italian Job (1969). The picture was released on VHS and DVD at the end of 2002.

Reviews: ‘It’s strictly more of the same from the groovidelic shagmeister … usually fun even if it’s not terribly funny. Caine as Dad was an inspired casting idea...’ - Variety
‘Extravagant, uneven, retro-happy celebration of the movies as international setters of indelible style… The movie is remarkably spry and inspired...’ – Entertainment Weekly

Verdict: This is a broad comedy stuffed full of slapstick, in-jokes and hilarious homages. The opening superstar cameo sequence is the highpoint of the film, but Austin Powers in Goldmember doesn’t outstay its welcome. Director Roach keeps the pace moving while the script by Myers and McCullers is laden with juvenile japes. But this movie is not just fart jokes and scatological humour. It also features a density of media cross-references matched only in better episodes of TV sitcom The Simpsons. Caine steals his scenes as the oldest swinger in town, performing a parody of a parody of himself. In the midst of all this, the film examines father and son relationships with surprising, heartfelt care. If you enjoyed the two previous movies in the franchise, you should love this dumb fun.


THE QUIET AMERICAN (2002)
Cast: Michael Caine (Thomas Fowler), Brendan Fraser (Alden Pyle), Do Thi Hai Yen (Phuong), Rade Serbedzija (Inspector Vigot), Tzi Ma (Hinh), Robert Stanton (Joe Tunney), Holmes Osborne (Bill Granger), Quang Hai (General Thé), Ferdinand Hoang (Mr Muoi), Pham Thi Mai Hoa (Phuong’s Sister), Mathias Mlekuz (French Captain).
Crew: Phillip Noyce (director), Staffan Ahrenberg and William Horberg (producers), Christopher Hampton and Robert Schenkkan (writers), Craig Armstrong (music), Christopher Doyle, Huu Tuan Nguyen and Dat Quang (cinematography), John Scott (editor), Roger Ford (production designer).

Synopsis: Thomas Fowler is a British journalist for The Times newspaper based in Saigon, Vietnam, during the early 1950s. The French Army was fighting a war against Communists. Fowler has a young Vietnamese mistress, Phuong. The reporter meets Alden Pyle, an American who says he is part of the medical team with an economic aid mission in Vietnam. The Times summons Fowler back to its London office, but the correspondent asks for more time, claiming he is working on a big story. Pyle meets Phuong and falls in love with her. Fowler goes into the country and visits a town where the people have been massacred. Pyle turns up, claiming to be on a medical mission. He believes a third force must take over Vietnam from the French, to save the country from Communism. A new political party emerges, led by the self-appointed General Thé. Fowler writes to his Catholic wife in England, asking for a divorce. The reporter tries to interview Thé, asking if the general’s men had any involvement with the massacre. Pyle is at the general’s camp and protects the journalist.

Fowler’s wife writes back, refusing a divorce. He lies to Phuong about the letter but she discovers the truth and leaves him for Pyle. A terrorist bombing in central Saigon kills dozens of civilians, including women and children. Fowler sees Pyle in the aftermath, speaking fluent Vietnamese. The correspondent realises Pyle works for the CIA. Fowler confronts the American about his part in the bombing, but Pyle is unrepentant. He admits arming Thé but says such massacres will guarantee more American funding and ultimately save lives. Fowler realises Pyle is behind both atrocities. The reporter betrays Pyle to the Communists, who murder the American. Fowler persuades Phuong to resume being his mistress. Fowler stays on as The Times’ correspondent as events escalate into the Vietnam War…

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Graham Greene’s novel The Quiet American was first published in 1955, inspired by his time spent as a newspaper correspondent in Vietnam. Director Joseph L Mankiewicz shot the first adaptation of the book in 1958, with Michael Redgrave and Audie Murphy. Greene was infuriated by the film, which downplayed the book’s anti-CIA stance. He wrote a vitriolic article accusing Mankiewicz of using the movie as a weapon to murder an author.

Four decades later Australian director Phillip Noyce finally got the go-ahead for a new version of The Quiet American, after five years’ preparation. Christopher Hampton and Robert Schenkkan wrote the adaptation, Hampton having previously scripted another Greene adaptation, The Honorary Consul (1983). The crucial part of British journalist Thomas Fowler went to Caine, on a roll following his Oscar win as best supporting actor for The Cider House Rules (1999). ‘When they offered the part to me,’ the actor told the Australian edition of Empire, ‘I thought it was Christmas. How many roles are there for men of my age with that emotional range?’

Caine finished filming Quicksand (2002) early in 2001 and began preparing for his new role. The actor would turn 68 during the production but was going to be playing a 55-year-old. ‘I lost 25 pounds, dyed my hair and had four pounds of make-up on,’ he told The Age newspaper in 2003, ‘and I tried to suck my stomach in on the wide shots.’ The actor removed carbohydrates from his diet and walked five miles a day to shed the weight.

Caine partly based his performance on Greene. ‘I didn’t know him very well,’ he told a BBC cinema website, ‘but I knew a great deal about him. One of my best friends is Bryan Forbes, who was one of Graham’s best friends. So I knew a lot by proxy. I just copied something of the way he [Green] spoke, and his movements. They were very small.’ The actor also spent time with a journalist in Vietnam, observing what the reporter did and was advised on how to play an opium user by an addict.

Production of the $30 million picture began in Vietnam during February 2001 and continued for three months. Location shooting took place at Ho Chi Minh City, the ancient port town of Hoi An, in the northern province Ninh Binh and at the capital Hanoi. Studio work was lensed in Sydney, Australia. Caine told the Hollywood Reporter he was surprised at how welcoming the people of Vietnam had been and how beautiful the country was. ‘I expected to see a war-torn land, and I saw no sign of war at all. It was fabulous for me … to be in actual places where he [Greene] was. People pointed at windows saying, “That window in the Continental Hotel, that’s the room where he wrote The Quiet American.” This part was the maximum degree of difficulty because it’s so subtle; I put my heat and soul into it. At the end of that picture, when we got back to England, I sat in the armchair looking at my wife, and I said, “I’ve got nothing left here.”

The film got its first screening as a rough-cut in New York on September 10, 2001. The next day terrorists attacked America, flying two jumbo jets into the twin towers of World Trade Centre in New York and killing thousands of people. Another plane was crashed into the Pentagon at Washington, DC. Overnight a film with award-winning potential turned into the movie nobody wanted. American and British distribution rights had been acquired by Miramax for $5.5 million. Co-chairman Harvey Weinstein later told the New York Times what happened next: ‘I showed the film to some people and staff, and they said, “Are you out of your mind? You can’t release this now, it’s unpatriotic.”’

Miramax considered dumping the movie and began shopping it around to other distributors. Meanwhile Noyce continued working on the film’s post-production, with computer generated imagery used to make modern Vietnamese cities resemble their 1950s counterparts. Weinstein reportedly ordered the toning down of a scene in which a character accused America of adventurism. The final cut of The Quiet American was delivered to Miramax in May 2002.

Word leaked out that the distributors planned to release the film in January 2003, too late for Oscar consideration and a month when lesser movies are dumped in cinemas. Caine lobbied Weinstein for the film’s release to be brought forward. He even threatened to do no promotional work for his starring role in another movie to which Miramax held US distribution rights, The Actors (2003). Caine’s cause was supported by Noyce, Australian actress Nicole Kidman and two Oscar-winning executive producers attached to The Quiet American, Anthony Minghella and Sydney Pollack. But Weinstein was still reluctant to distribute a film critical of American intervention in foreign countries, especially with the US Government preparing to go to war with Iraq.

Miramax eventually relented and agreed to give the picture its world premiere at the Toronto Film Festival in September 2002. Caine told the American Press Association (AP) he gave Weinstein a promise: ‘If it doesn’t go well in Toronto, I’ll bring a shovel and help you bury it.’ Noyce used guerrilla tactics to create a buzz for The Quiet American before the festival, organising special screenings for key American film critics. The Toronto screening got a standing ovation and raves in US media, with several reviewers calling Caine’s performance a certainty for Oscar nomination. Miramax gave the picture a two-week run in a handful of US cinemas so it qualified for consideration at the Oscars.

Caine campaigned relentlessly on behalf of the film, earning himself nominations for best actor at the Golden Globes (losing to Jack Nicholson in About Schmidt), the BAFTAs and the Oscars (losing both to Adrien Brody in The Pianist). Caine won awards from film critics in London and San Francisco. ‘This has made my day,’ Caine told AP after hearing of his Oscar nomination. ‘I am absolutely delighted, I couldn’t be happier. It’s been a long, long journey. I just wanted to see whether I could get a nomination. And I’ve got one, I’m happy now and my work is done.’

The Quiet American reached Britain in November 2002. The 15-rated film got strong reviews, especially for Caine’s performance, and grossed nearly $3 million. In America the R-rated picture went into wider release after the Oscar nominations were announced in February 2003. It had grossed more than $12 million when this book went to press. Globally the picture had taken more than $22 million. A DVD and video release was expected in the UK and US before the end of 2003.

Caine told many interviewers he considered his performance in The Quiet American as the best of his long career. ‘There are moments in everyone’s life when everything comes together,’ he told the Dallas Fort Worth Star Telegram in 2003. ‘That’s what happened here. I was experienced enough an actor. I was experienced enough a man. I wanted to do something that I could really disappear into the character … rather than have a little of Michael Caine in there, like a movie star thing. I believe in this movie probably more than any other movie I’ve ever done.’

Reviews: ‘This may in fact be the best performance of Michael Caine’s career.’ – Roger Ebert, Chicago Sun-Times
‘A career-capping performance by Michael Caine. One of the year’s most thoughtful films.’ – Time

Verdict: Does The Quiet American live up to all the hype? Surprisingly, yes – but don’t expect a sweeping epic or some grand blockbuster. Noyce’s film is subtle and intelligent, holding back from the sort of bombast that normally wins awards and critical kudos. The picture submerges you in the atmosphere of 1950s Vietnam, all too aware of the cost of imperialist attitudes. The global crisis that threatened to sink this picture also made its subject matter more relevant. It remains to be seen whether this version of The Quiet American will retain its power once the current political climate has changed. But time will not diminish Caine’s performance in this film, arguable the finest of his career. It’s a masterclass of nuance and restraint, many emotions played out just in his eyes. Even in a poor film, the performance would be worth watching. In this context it’s essential viewing.

Vote now in the Eagle Awards

The Eagle Awards have unveiled the top five nominees in each category for the best comics of 2006 - cast your vote here. I'm not going to make any suggestions or requests, bar ar: when you reach the final category, click the button for Tom Frame to receive the Eagle Hall of Fame award. If he wins, it'll be posthumous, but it's no more than Tom deserves for decades of service to British comics.

Films of Michael Caine #74: Get Carter (2000)

Cast: Sylvester Stallone (Jack Carter), Miranda Richardson (Gloria), Rachael Leigh Cook (Doreen), Rhona Mitra (Geraldine), Johnny Strong (Eddie), John C McGinley (Con McCarty), Alan Cumming (Jeremy Kinnear), Michael Caine (Cliff Brumby), John Cassini (Thorpey), Mickey Rourke (Cyrus Paice), Mark Boone Jr (Jim Davis), Garwin Sanford (Les Fletcher).

Crew: Stephen Kay (director), Mark Canton, Elie Samaha and Neil Canton (producers), David McKenna (writer), Tyler Bates (music), Mauro Fiore (cinematography), Jerry Greenberg (editor), Charles J H Wood (production designer).

Synopsis: Jack Carter is a bone-breaker for Las Vegas mobster Les Fletcher. Jack goes home to Seattle for his brother Richie’s funeral, against Fletcher’s orders. Carter decides to investigate Richie’s death in a drunk driving accident. Richie worked at a bar owned by Cliff Brumby. Learning Richie had a mistress called Geraldine, Jack traces her to an old enemy, Cyrus Paice, who runs porn websites. Paice leads Carter to an internet millionaire, Jeremy Kinnear. Kinnear denies knowing about Richie’s death. Brumby tries to get Jack to leave town.

Jack sees a security tape from Brumby’s bar that shows Geraldine giving Richie a computer disc. Carter locates the disc, which shows Richie’s teenage daughter Doreen being drugged and used in a sex show with Geraldine and one of Brumby’s men, Eddie. Paice kills Geraldine with a heroin overdose. Jack murders Eddie and Paice as revenge. He threatens to kill Kinnear, who was involved with Paice. Kinnear says Paice was working for someone else. As Jack prepares to leave Seattle, he find Brumby trying to retrieve the computer disc. Carter murders Brumby…

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By the late 1990s Mike Hodges’ film Get Carter (1971) was recognised as a modern classic. An American company acquired the rights to the original source material, Ted Lewis’s novel Jack’s Return Home, and commissioned a new version as a vehicle for ageing action star Sylvester Stallone. David McKenna wrote the adaptation, transferring events from Newcastle to Seattle in America.

Stephen Kay was brought on as director, having only helmed two small independent movies. The new version of Get Carter was a step up to the big time with a $40 million budget and an international star as the lead. ‘I was completely daunted by the notion of remaking a movie I really dug,’ Kay says on the film’s DVD commentary track. He demanded Caine’s involvement. ‘I don’t think you make this movie if you don’t have Michael Caine in it. When he said he would do it, there was no way they were going to drag me out of this movie. It was great to have him, and he’s just a champ.’

But Caine took some convincing when first approached, as he told the Daily Telegraph early in 2000. ‘The producer called and said, “It’ll be fun.” My agent said, “Michael’s not in it for the fun, he’s in it for money. Make an offer.” If someone says to me, “Do it for fun,” I always say, “No, give me the money. I’ll have fun afterwards.”’

The production began in October 1999 with filming in Vancouver and location work in Seattle and Las Vegas. Caine told an interviewer the shoot had been good fun. But preview audiences disliked the ending and Caine was called back for re-shoots. ‘When I was Carter in the first film, I killed the character I play in the remake,’ Caine told the Evening Standard in 2001. ‘Sly Stallone didn’t kill me and I went round telling journalists he would be a gentler Carter than I was. A few months later I got called back for a day’s shooting. I turned up and Sly blew my brains out.’

In August 2000 Kay predicted the remake would not be well received in Britain. ‘We’re going to get crushed in London,’ he told Entertainment Weekly. ‘It doesn’t matter what we bring – they’re going to kill us. It’s tantamount to a British filmmaker remaking Martin Scorcese’s Mean Streets (1973).’ Released in the US during October 2000 with an R rating, the picture was derided by critics. It grossed less than $15 million.

In Britain Hodges told Empire nobody had contacted him about the remake. ‘I gather Carter’s got a goatee beard and it’s a redemptive film and at the end of it he survives,’ the director said. ‘So it’s patently a completely different film. It seems to me like they’ve just kept the title.’ The remake never reached British cinemas. It had to wait two years before being released directly on video and DVD in the UK, rated 15.

In 2001 Caine told Empire he had never seen the remake. ‘I thought maybe it would work. Sly’s a friend of mine, which is why I did it. I didn’t know anything about the movie. I mean, I take responsibility for the ones where my name’s over the title. Otherwise…’

A year later, Caine’s memories of the film had soured further. ‘The moment I arrived on set, I didn’t like it,’ he told an interviewer for the Australian edition of Empire. ‘I only worked for two days but they weren’t two of the happiest days of my life. I just felt, what the hell am I doing here?’

Reviews: ‘A useless remake of the Mike Hodges’ 1971 British gangland cult classic … this latest Sylvester Stallone “comeback” picture lacks excitement, credibility, suspense, character insight or anything else that might conceivable engage viewers.’ – Variety
‘In short, it isn’t a patch on Mike Hodges’ version; however, approached as a work in its own right, it’s not as bad as many would have you believe.’ – Empire

Verdict: Even if you’ve never seen the 1971 original, this film is unlikely to satisfy. A triumph of style over substance, Get Carter (2000) tries to create a hybrid of violent action and moody melodrama. Instead the film creates a big old mess, wasting a strong supporting case and nearly two hours in the life of anybody who watches it. The new version abandons the original’s powerful nihilism for a half-baked tale of redemption and forgiveness. Stallone never shows a fraction of his predecessor’s depth or implacability. Caine only appears in four scenes. If you want a good Stallone movie, look elsewhere. If you want to watch an updated Get Carter, try The Limey (1999) – it’s a lot better than this tripe.

Apology to BBC Radio Scotland's Comedy Dept.

I've been asked by BBC Radio Scotland to remove all material from the recent comedy briefing in Glasgow, as the material discussed at the briefing was solely for those present. I can only apologise unreservedly for my error in posting the notes on a public website, and please ask that others do not compound my mistake by further circulating the material. Thank you.

My favourite 2000 AD covers

Between Christmas 1995 and June 2000 I commissioned more than 200 covers for the weekly science fiction anthology 2000 AD. In its early years the comic had a dedicated art editor, whose jobs included conceiving and commissioning the cover art. By the time I joined 2000 AD, then art editor Steve Cook was in the office only two days a week due to budget cuts. He achieved miracles in that limited time, but responsibility for conceiving and commissioning cover art was one of my tasks.

Coming up with something new, exciting and eye-catching every week was not always easy. Our best comic strip artists were usually busy illustrating the stories that were the title’s stock in trade, so finding good and reliable artists available to do the cover was always a battle. Finding inspiration for the cover image was often even harder. Ideally, you wanted an image that reflected the most exciting thing happening inside. But frequently we had no idea what that might be, as the artwork hadn’t arrived in the office. So we had to be a bit more conceptual and devise more design-led covers.

I liked covers with multiple meanings, something that worked in context for regular 2000 AD readers but might also catch the eye of passing punters. So I used lots of homages and parodies as the starting point for a cover, collecting postcards of great film posters and favourite images that might lend themselves to a 2000 AD cover. Sometimes that worked, other times it sucked. The great thing about 2000 AD is there’s always another issue next week, so you can move on from your mistakes quickly.

Just for fun, here are ten of my favourite covers from among the 200+ that I commissioned. I’ve deliberately chosen a single cover from ten different artists. Certain artists got a lot of cover work from me and could easily have been represented by many more in this selection, but I wanted to get a mix of styles. Each cover is accompanied by a few sentences about the image, the context and the artist. They’re presented in chronological order of publication.

PROG 1053 by Jason Brashill. Wow, I’d forgotten how creepy this image is. The reason Anderson looks so realistic [I was going to say lifelike, but that’s hardly accurate] is that Jason based her on a real woman. This is a really simple, but effective cover. I love the way the coverlines seem to bend around the body bag as it’s being zipped shut.

PROG 1073 by Simon Davis. B.L.A.I.R. 1 was a political satire of an old 2000 AD strip called M.A.C.H. 1, itself a homage to US TV series The Six Million Dollar Man. This cover is a pisstake of an old episode of The Goodies where a giant cat attacks the Post Office Tower in London, itself a homage to the film King Kong. I’m still not convinced that major coverline reads well, laid over the artwork.

PROG 1095 by Duncan Fegredo. A tribute Gustav Klimt’s famous painting, The Kiss. Duncan Fegredo actually painted this in two pieces, the full colour image of a naked Slaine groping a nun [all done in the best possible taste], and the squiggly line art behind it as another piece [and subsequently tinted blue]. Quite a mix of fonts, but it works.

PROG 1107 by Dermot Power. I think Dermot was still getting to grips with Adobe Painter when he produced this striking image. Inside the comic Judge DeMarco snogs Dredd, the first time he’d been kissed by a sane woman, so it deserved a cover. Remarkably restrained use of coverlines for once by me, letting the art do the talking.

PROG 1158 by Steve Cook. Our art editor Steve Cook was always well ahead of any coming trend, and this Photoshop cover is a classic by him. Long before Bollywood crossed over into the mainstream of British pop culture, Steve pushed to do this cover and the results were stunning. Different from our usual covers, but still 2000 AD.

PROG 1165 by Henry Flint & Chris Blythe. Henry originally produced another cover for this issue, a slightly murky piece of painted art. He’d drawn this image of Nemesis in black and white for an introductory page, but it was so strong I got computer colourist Chris Blythe to work some magic and this was the result. A great return for Nemesis.

PROG 2000 by Brian Bolland. This was 2000 AD’s first 100-page Christmas special issue and I wanted a suitably epic cover image. Against the odds, 2000 AD had made it to the year 2000, when so many other British comics had died during its lifetime. That’s why the characters are planting 2000 AD’s banner on a mountain of old British comics, both as a tribute to classic photo of US soldiers raising the American flag on Iwo Jima in WWII, but also to all those late, great British comics of yesterday. Everybody in the editorial office had a hand in this one, and Brian Bolland did us proud with his art.

PROG 1188 by Mark Harrison. I agonised long and hard over which Mark Harrison cover to choose, as he produced so many crackers for me on 2000 AD. This image won the day over more obvious candidates, like Durham Red on Prog 1111. Missionary Man in the snow sums up the character perfectly, his resolute fight for justice, no matter what.

PROG 1190 by Greg Staples. Greg was another prolific cover artist for the weekly. After much debate I went for this comedic effort featuring Sinister Dexter. The dialogue’s a little nod to 1999’s hit film The Matrix. This cover is perhaps proof you can have too much creative white space. Sinister’s bizarre shirt is a particularly nice, subtle touch.

PROG 1194 by Cliff Robinson & Chris Blythe. Hard to think of a less dignified cover for Dredd, but this always makes me smile. It was inspired by a Tim Bradstreet cover for a Vertigo crime anthology comic. The story that accompanies this cover’s great too. I contemplated published without any dialogue, so strong was the storytelling by Gordon Rennie and Chris Weston. I bottled out when Gordon grumbled at the concept. Still, great line art by Cliff and Chris Blythe’s usual, exemplary job on the colouring.

The unofficial Sopranos episode guide #1

Episode #01: Pilot (a.k.a. The Sopranos)
US Transmission Date: 10 January 1999
UK Transmission Date: 15 July 1999

Writer: David Chase • Director: David Chase
Cast: Michael Gaston (Mahaffey), Joe Lisi (Dick Barone), Alton Clinton (MRI Technician), Phil Coccioletti (Nils Borglund), Giuseppe Delipiano (Restaurant Owner), Siberia Federico (Irina), Justine Miceli (Nursing Home Director), Joe Pucillo (Beppy), Michael Santoro (Father Phil)

Storyline: Tony Soprano attends his first appointment with a psychiatrist, Dr Jennifer Melfi. He suffered a blackout but medical tests showed nothing physically wrong with him. Tony describes himself as a waste management consultant. In flashback, Tony recalls events from the day he blacked out. He was obsessed by a family of wild ducks in his swimming pool. The day of the blackout was his son AJ’s thirteenth birthday and Tony’s wife Carmela was planning a big party for family and friends. Daughter Meadow is agitating for permission to go skiing at Aspen with her friends.

Tony goes to work with Christopher Moltisanti. They run down a gambler heavily in debt and behind on his payments. Later Tony meets his crew to discuss the Kolar Brothers, rivals for the garbage hauling business Tony controls. Christopher volunteers to deal with the Kolars. Tony hears that his uncle, Corrado ‘Junior’ Soprano, plans to have another gangster murdered at Vesuvio restaurant. That would ruin the business, which is run by an old school friend of Tony called Artie Bucco.

Tony visits his mother Livia at her home, and tries to persuade her to move into a retirement community. He also asks her to intervene with Uncle Junior about the planned hit. At the birthday barbeque, Tony sees the ducks fly away. He blacks out. Christopher murders Emil Kolar without permission. Later Christopher and Big Pussy Bonpensiero dispose of the body after unsuccessfully attempting to throw the corpse into a Kolar Brothers dumpster. Carmela catches Meadow breaking curfew and cancels the Aspen trip. During a therapy session Dr Melfi presses Tony to admit he is depressed, but he refuses and storms out.

Tony and his family take Livia for a tour of a retirement community. During the tour Tony blacks out again. Soon after he returns to therapy and Dr Melfi prescribes Prozac. Fearful for Artie’s restaurant, Tony tries to get his friend out of town with free tickets for a cruise. But Artie’s wife Charmaine refuses them because she does not want to be connected with mobsters. Tony tells Carmela that he is seeing a therapist and on medication. She is overjoyed that he has sought help. Tony fears for his life if anyone else finds out that he is seeing a psychiatrist. To prevent the hit, Tony has Silvio Dante blows up Vesuvio.

Tony starts feeling better and believes the Prozac is responsible. Dr Melfi points out that it takes several weeks for the drug to build up effective levels. Any progress is due to the therapy, not the Prozac. Tony tells her about a dream and realises he fears losing his family, like he lost the ducks. Junior is outraged by Tony’s interference. He tells Livia that he may have to move against her son. She says nothing…

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

Mobspeak: Tony describes himself as a waste management consultant (a euphemism for being a mobster). Tony and Christopher see a client with a boo-boo (prostitute). Uncle Junior plans to whack (murder) a gangster at Vesuvio restaurant. Christopher says he just wet (executed) a guy after killing Emil Kolar. Tony complains that nobody keeps the code of silence (a Mafia vow of silence during police interrogation) anymore when they get pinched (arrested). Christopher wants to become a made man (be indoctrinated into the mob). Uncle Junior says Tony is giving him agita (agitation).

Mamma Mia: Livia says she never answers the telephone when it’s dark outside. She also never drives when rain is predicted. Livia undermines Tony at every opportunity. She scoffs at him, sarcastically announcing that he knows everything. She also badmouths her brother-in-law, complaining that Junior comes to visit her. Twice she fights back tears when remembering her late husband. ‘He was a saint’ she sobs. This will become one of Livia’s catchphrases. She is set against moving to Green Grove retirement community, which she describes as a nursing home. She claims to have seen women in wheelchairs there, babbling like idiots. Livia says her son thinks she’ll die faster in a nursing home. Finally, she complains when Tony uses mesquite on the barbeque, because it makes the sausage taste peculiar.

Bright Lights, Baked Ziti: There’s a feast of different foods in the pilot episode. At breakfast Carmela tries to feed Meadow and Hunter some of the previous night’s sfogliatell, saying they can’t just have cranberry juice for breakfast. AJ dunks a croissant into the milk jug, disgusting his sister. Tony has a breakfast meeting outside a pork store but no-one eats. Silvio comes by to get some capicolli. Tony and Christopher go to Vesuvio for lunch. Uncle Junior is already there, eating with some friends. Father Phil brings a box of crème anglais to AJ’s birthday barbeque. AJ takes a call from his grandmother – she won’t be coming. The chubby boy seems more concerned about missing out on Livia’s speciality baked pasta dish. ‘So what, no fucking ziti now?’

Carmela and Father Phil are about to enjoy popcorn while watching a movie but are interrupted by Meadow trying to sneak out of the house. Carmela cancels the skiing trip. As revenge, Meadows later refuses to join her mother for their annual trip to have tea and scones at the New York Plaza Hotel. Christopher eats meatballs while Tony tries to give Artie Bucco tickets for a Caribbean cruise. When he tries to persuade his wife that they should accept the tickets, Artie says he will go psychotic if he has to stick his hand up the ass of another lobster without taking a break. Pussy scoffs an ice cream while he and Hesh menace Mahaffey, a gambler heavily in debt to Hesh. Pussy throws the ice cream over a waterfall to show how easily Mahaffey could fall to his own doom.

Tony takes his mistress to a restaurant, when he bumps into Dr Melfi. Several nights later, Tony takes Carmela to the same restaurant. The owner welcome Tony as if it has been months, not days, since his last visit. Afterwards Carmela brings her primavera home for Meadow as a peace offering. The sulking teen turns down her favourite food, finishing a bowl of cereal instead. Tony is the barbeque chef at AJ’s rescheduled birthday party, but he lets Artie cook to help him feel better.

Mobbed Up: Carmela and Father Phil discuss mob movies. Tony watches ‘The Godfather Part II’ on laserdisc all the time. He likes the part where Vito goes back to Sicily. Carmela doesn’t think much of the third film in Coppola’s trilogy. ‘Three was, like, what happened?’ Father Phil wants to know where Tony ranks ‘Goodfellas’ among great mob movies, but the conversation gets interrupted. Christopher misquotes one of the most famous lines from ‘The Godfather’ – ‘Luca Brassi sleeps with the fishes’ – as Louis Brassi. Pussy corrects him.

How Do You Feel?: Tony tells Dr Melfi that he feels fine and is back to work after the initial blackout. He admits to feelings of loss but questions the value of therapy. He prefers American men to be strong, silent types who aren’t in touch with their feelings, like Gary Cooper. Tony admits having qualms about his profession. He finds himself pretending like a sad clown, laughing on the surface while crying inside. By the end of the episode Tony says he had constant feelings of dread, but doesn’t know of what he’s afraid.

Sleeping With The Fishes: Emil Kolar, shot repeatedly by Christopher during a secret meeting at the pork store. Christopher tries to dump the body in a garbage dumpster owned by the Kolars, but is dissuaded by Pussy. He offers to help cut up and dispose of the corpse.

Always With The…: Tony takes Carmela to dinner and says he has a confession to make. Before he can go any further, Carmela gets ready a glass of wine to throw in his face, infuriating Tony. ‘Always with the drama, you!’

I Dream of Jeannie Cusamano: Tony tells Dr Melfi about a dream in which he unscrews his belly button and his penis falls off. While Tony is looking for a mechanic to repair him, a bird swoops down and grabs the penis in its beak before flying away. Dr Melfi links this to the family of ducks in Tony’s swimming pool that flew away.

Quote/Unquote: Tony remembers how his mother slowly destroyed his father, a tough mobster. ‘He was a squeaking little gerbil when he died.’

Tony takes his mother a ghetto blaster but she rejects it, preferring to drag up old grievances. ‘I bought CDs for a broken record,’ Tony laments.

Tony complains that modern mobsters don’t follow the code of silence, even if it leads to prison. ‘Guys today have no room for the penal experience.’

Silvio Dante offers a typical non sequitur: ‘Sadness accrues.’

Soundtrack: ‘Woke Up This Morning’ by A3. ‘Who Can You Trust?’ by Morcheeba. ‘Shame, Shame, Shame’ by Shirley and Co. ‘I’m So Happy I Can’t Stop Crying’ by Sting. ‘I Wonder Why’ by Dion and the Belmonts. ‘Rumble’ by Link Wray. ‘Who’s Sorry Now’ by Connie Francis. ‘I’m A Man’ by Bo Diddley. ‘Fired Up’ by Funky Green Dogs. ‘Little Star’ by the Elegants. ‘No More I Love Yous’ by Annie Lennox. ‘The Beast In Me’ by Nick Lowe.

Surveillance Report: In the pilot, the pork store when Tony’s crew hang out is called Centanni’s. However, in the title sequence for this episode and in all future appearances the pork store is called Satriale’s. Two characters in the pilot are portrayed by different actors from those who play the parts in subsequent episodes. Here Father Phil is played by Michael Santoro and Tony’s mistress Irina is played by Siberia Federico. In future episodes they will be played by Paul Schulze and Oksana Babiy.

The Verdict: ‘Hope comes in many forms.’ New Jersey mobster Tony Soprano goes into therapy but the problems with his family and his (mob) Family will take more than a few sessions to sort out. The pilot is an assured debut for this groundbreaking show. Written and directed by the show’s creator David Chase, ‘Pilot’ (a.k.a. ‘The Sopranos’) adroitly establishes all the key characters, conflicts and themes. Already crucial plot points are being set up to pay off later in the season. This episode also works perfectly as a satisfying, stand-alone drama in its own right. The ducks in the pool are an adept framing device, as well as being a metaphor for Tony’s sense of loss. By the end of the pilot, he is happier and healthier – but the swimming pool is still empty in the closing shot. There will be no quick fixes for Tony Soprano…

Films of Michael Caine #73: Quills

Cast: Geoffrey Rush (The Marquis De Sade), Kate Winslet (Madeleine), Joaquin Phoenix (Coulmier), Michael Caine (Royer-Collard), Billie Whitelaw (Madame LeClerc), Patrick Malahide (Delbené), Amelia Warner (Simone), Jane Menelaus (Renee Pelagie), Stephen Moyer (Prouix), Tony Pritchard (Valcour), Michael Jenn (Cleante), Danny Babington (Pitou).

Crew: Philip Kaufman (director), Nick Wechsler, Julia Chasman and Peter Kaufman (producers), Doug Wright (writer), Stephen Warbeck (music), Rogier Stoffers (cinematography), Peter Boyle (editor), Martin Childs (production designer).

Synopsis: The Marquis De Sade is a captive in Charenton Asylum for the Insane. He writes pornographic novels and has the pages smuggled out to a publisher by a laundry lass, Madeleine. The asylum is run by the Abbé du Coulmier, who despairs of De Sade. Emperor Napoleon Bonaparte has De Sade’s latest book Justine burnt and sends Dr Royer-Collard to cure the author. In exchange for his services, the doctor is given a grand chateau and an architect called Prouix to help him renovate it. Royer-Collard takes a teenage orphan, Simone, from a nearby nunnery as his wife. De Sade hears about this and parodies the marriage in a graphic play performed by inmates for a public audience. Coulmier takes away the writer’s quills and ink, so De Sade writes in red ink on his bed linen with a wishbone. Royer-Collard discovers this and has the scribe’s cell stripped bare. So De Sade writes on his clothes, using his own blood as ink. The doctor has De Sade stripped naked and Madeleine flogged for her complicity.

Coulmier becomes obsessed with Madeleine. Inspired by De Sade’s writing, Simone seduces the architect Prouix. When they ran off together, Royer-Collard discovers one of De Sade’s books in Simone’s bed. The doctor tortures the author. But De Sade still finds a way to spread his words, whispering them to Madeleine through a chain of inmates. One of the insane sets fire to the asylum while another is inspired to cut out Madeleine’s tongue and drown her. Coulmier has De Sade’s tongue cut out as punishment. The writer uses his own excrement to write on cell walls. De Sade dies, choking himself to death on a crucifix rather than receive absolution. A year later, the asylum gets a new Abbé. Royer-Collard uses the inmates to publish De Sade’s writing, with the profits helping to rebuild Charenton. Coulmier is now an inmate, begging for a quill and ink to write his own story…

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

Quills was an award-winning play by Doug Wright. He spent five years developing a big screen adaptation, working with arthouse filmmaking studio Fox Searchlight. The script was offered to director Philip Kaufman, who was eager to work on the story. At the time America was gripped by a sex scandal involving then US President Bill Clinton, turning censorship, pornography and sexual hypocrisy into hot topics. The project was approved by Fox Searchlight with a budget of only $14 million.

Kaufman and his four leading actors (Geoffrey Rush, Kate Winslet, Joaquin Phoenix and Caine) all agreed to take pay cuts to help the film stay within its limited resources. The film was shot in England, with the Bedfordshire estate of Luton Hoo appearing as Charenton asylum while studio work took place at Pinewood. Unusually, Quills was filmed almost entirely in sequence.

Caine was cast as the malevolent Dr Royer-Collard. ‘I really, really enjoyed that character because very rarely do I play a total villain,’ the actor told Venice magazine in 2002. ‘I can usually find some redeeming feature, but that man had no redeeming features!’ Caine was full of praise for the actor playing his on-screen nemesis: ‘Geoffrey Rush was wonderful to work with, as well. One of the best movie actors around.’

Rush was just as enthusiastic about the experience of working opposite Caine: ‘He’s a legend,’ Rush told Rough Cut in 2000. ‘He tells you great stories about the absurdity of the profession that he’s encountered over a 35-year period. But then, when the camera is on, it’s like galvanising white heat that you’ve only got to respond to.’

Caine admitted being uncomfortable at playing a sequence when Royer-Collard consummates his lust for teen bride Simone. ‘The only way we could accomplish that, her and I, was to laugh through the whole thing,’ he told the Toronto Sun in 2001. ‘At times when she grimaced [on screen], she was holding back laughter. It’s pretty embarrassing at my age to be doing that with a girl who’s young enough to be my granddaughter.’

Quills had its world premiere at the Telluride Film Festival in September 2000, before getting a limited release in US cinemas during November, rated R. Critics were positive, and the film grossed $7 million over the next six months. Fox Searchlight pushed the film for recognition in the end of year awards. Quills won the National Board of Review’s best picture award, but otherwise had to be content with Oscar nominations in technical categories and for Rush as best actor.

The film reached British cinemas in January 2001, rated 18. Reviews were muted, but Caine was nominated as British supporting actor of the year by the London Critics’ Circle. The movie grossed just over $1 million in UK cinemas. It was released on video and DVD in 2001.

Reviews: ‘The film lacks an edge of danger or excitement that might have brought the subject alive in more than a cerebral way.’ – Variety
‘A complex, often funny and vividly-told tale, Quills ultimately cannot make up its mind what it wants to tell us.’ – Empire

Verdict: For a film brimming with sex, violence and pornography, Quills is surprisingly uninvolving. Visually the source material has been opened up to great effect, but the story remains stage-bound. Characters debate creative freedom and the hypocrisy of civilisation without ever invoking your sympathy or wits. Rush revels in his grandstand role as De Sade, gurning and gurgling with glee. By comparison the other characters are bland and lifeless, trapped in an inevitable escalation of horrors. Caine struggles to find a focus for his role, unassisted by spending much of his time in an irrelevant subplot involving his teenage wife. Quills looks great, but is altogether less than the sum of its parts.

Praise the lord and pass the ammunition

I'm not one for To-Do lists, but sometimes resort to them when I feel the many plates I've got spinning are getting out of control. That was me last Friday. Too many projects, not enough time and in danger of running like a headless chook between them, instead of focusing on and finishing one task at a time. Being a freelance writer, I'm often doing work for multiple clients. You don't want to let any of them down, in case they choose not to employ you again, but you also need to ensure a steady stream of income [not something I've achieved with any great success this month].

The good news is that as of this morning I've crossed two things off my list and bumped another, non-urgent project into next week. The big achievement was finishing the first draft of my TV drama pilot spec script. It's a project I've been developing under the help of Adrian Mead, thanks to the Scottish Books Trust's words@work mentoring scheme. I'm under no illusions about the amount of rewriting that lies ahead - there's that repeat beat at the end of act four, and it could well be missing an obligatory scene or three - but the relief at nailing down a first draft was palpable. Typically, I laboured for weeks over the first 35 pages and wrote the final 25 pages in a two-day frenzy, driving myself to reach FADE OUT.

Getting that off my To-Do leaves a thousand-word article to write [once I've finished the research], a three-page plot synopsis to devise [ideally accompanied by a clutch of single-paragrpah story pitches] and the small matter of writing my next piece of assessed word for the MA Screenwriting course. In the next ten days we have to deliver a premise, outline and detailed synopsis for what's planned as our final project. My problem? I haven't written any of those things yet. To make matters worse, I'm still vascillating between two potential stories - a contemporary horror comedy, and a historical murder mystery. I think I'll probably write a premise for both and take them to college on Friday, see if the rest of the class can help me make up my damned mind.

In the meantime, I've research to do and a Phantom plot synopsis to write. Onwards!

Notes from Adrian Mead pitching seminar Pt. 2

Here's the second half of my notes from the TV drama pitching seminar Adrian Mead held in Edinburgh last May. As always, any inaccuracies, anachronism or errors are my fault, so don't blame Adrian. Right, on to the notes...

ADRIAN MEAD PITCHING SEMINAR Pt. 2

There are two root types of stories, from which everything else sprouts – drama and comedy. In a drama the character succeeds by their very best efforts. In a comedy the character succeeds despite their best efforts. Everything else grows out of these two root types. It’s a very good way to interrogate your story’s genre at its most basic level. If you creating a hybrid genre, there’s the great danger of scrambling your story. This is not about limiting your ideas. The more your know, the more you can break the rules. Rules can be broken, but you have to be very smart, really know your stuff. You’ve got to know all the conventions of your chosen genre. There’s a third branch of the root types and that’s tragedy: the character fails despite their best efforts. Where you stop your story can define what genre it is.

To create a great title for your story, try these methods. Titles can convey the genre to your story e.g. Star Wars; Medium; Grisly Tales for Gruesome Kids; Diagnosis Murder. Titles can emphasis the crisis: Bad Day at Black Rock; Kramer vs Kramer. Titles that pose an intriguing question: Waking the Dead; Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Garcia. Titles can spotlight the star’s role: Rocky; Linda Green; Crocodile Dundee. Titles can explore cultural references: Monarch of the Glenn, The Untouchables. Titles can cash in on current slang: You’ve Got Mail; Dazed and Confused – but there’s a danger it’ll date your story e.g. The Smoking Room. Titles can perform triple duty: Reservoir Dogs – it tells us it’s an ensemble, it creates a metaphor, establishes a mood; Mean Streets. You can tell a hell of a lot just in your title.

There’s a lot of people now looking for things that aren’t London-centric, because of the new BBC Nations and Regions policy. BBC Wales is very, very strong, a tough place to break in as a result.

When developing your protagonist, try the HERALDIC SHIELD exercise: draw a shield, split it into four quadrants. Top two quadrants are personal, bottom two quadrants are career. Top left: what’s the personal achievement they’re proudest of? Draw a picture of it. Top right: what’s his big personal goal he’d like to achieve in the future past? Draw it. Do the same things in the bottom quadrants: greatest career achievement to date bottom left; greatest career goal bottom right. This is about them – not the story goal. And give them a motto at the top!

Stuff like this – heraldic shields and mind-maps – great for when you’re stuck, or when you’re trying to revive and resurrect an old idea. These methods make it fun, play with it, be outrageous. Go back to an old concept and revisit it with these tools and you’ll have fun – you should be better writers than you were before.

George Bernard Shaw: If you can’t get rid of the family skeleton, make it dance.

Context defines your protagonist: period, occupation – hugely influential, often overlooked. Their key emotion – mad, sad, glad or scared? Those four emotions are the key to your character. Their attitudes, their emotions, their backstory – all crucial. KNOW YOUR CHARACTER.

HOW TO HAVE MEETINGS: We don’t want to salesmen, but we have to be – it’s about selling our selves. Let’s talk about how you run a meeting and read people. It’s not about teaching you tricks. Same of you may be good at this anyway, just naturally.

At this point in the seminar Adrian handed over to Morag, an interpersonal skills coach and one of the most sought after experts in her field. Morag said: The way we read each other and interact is much more subtle than we realise. 55% of message processing is done by body language. 38% is via voice: tone, pitch, pace. Only 7% is from the actual words. [This is solely applicable in a physical face-to-face situation, not email or video conferencing or phone calls.]

90% of what people think about you is judged in the first 9 seconds they met you. We take in information through our senses. Those people who see things in pictures, will look upwards when they’re trying to recall something. Those who prefer to have things spoken, who process in words and remember things in words and streams of words – they’ll look to the side, that’s where the ears are. Those who use their emotions to process information, they’ll look down to their body – they are called Kinaesthetic learners.

People who are visual will say: I can see that, I can picture that. Auditory: I hear what you’re saying… - they’ll use sound-based words. Kinaesthetic: I feel good about that. As you walk into a room, watch where people’s eyes are moving to figure which they are. Kinaesthetic people like movement; audio response to language; visual respond to props. Put a mix of all three in your presentation and you should hit all three.

Roleplaying exercise: different writers arriving for a pitch meeting. Type A: ingratiating, disorganised. People hold on to things they don’t need, as a security blanket. You’re looking for the three opportunities, so they don’t become three strikes. Strike One: let’s get started. Open body language, invite them to form a bond. Strike Two: why don’t you tell us what you’ve got for us today. Once people start sitting back, crossing their arms over their bodies. Watch their shoulders – if they come forward, they are interested. If they go back, they might be relaxing – or, more likely, you’re losing them.

If you feel the meeting sliding away from you, pull out your PD and read it aloud. Desperate measures, but it can save the meeting. Strike Three: why did you come to see us today? Last chance. Watch for a chopping hand movement – cutting to the nub. At least get your pitch in, if nothing else – even if it’s a dull monotone. Type B: the pitching maniac. Don’t be so aggressive you frighten the other person. Don’t jump in and swamp them with your talking. Have a back-up story to pitch.

HOW TO PITCH PROPERLY. Walk in, shake hands, don’t crowd them – put your head at the same level as theirs if possible – make eye contact. Not everybody wants to shake hands, not everybody is tactile. Watch for the signs as you walk in – are they holding a security blanket. First thing you do: ask ‘How long have we got?’ If you start in on a pitch and the warning signs are bad, pause and let them say it’s a non-starter. If so, go to your back-up pitch.

If their head tilts, they’re interested. If they ask questions, that’s good, especially if they go up at the end of the interrogative. Chuck in a big visual image. Keep it grounded in today. Physical contact with somebody makes you more memorable to them. Listen as much as you talk. Go in prepared, know about the people, the organisation. Have your back-up stuff ready in case things go off-stream. Have a clean, professional persona to present yourself.

MIRRORING BEHAVIOURS: a strong way to send a signal that you are empathetic with them. If you can [subtly] reflect their body language, it creates a bond. People who are good friends will naturally mirror each other gestures. At the start of your career, you’ll almost certainly start off writing somebody else’s characters – it’s all about can they work with you? Leaving: make eye contact, shake hands if possible. Afterwards: send them a card!

There are people who don’t like a lot of eye contact. If they don’t want it, it should be obvious – so stop staring at them. You can sit slightly side on to them and make them more comfortable as a consequence. People instinctively recognise phoney gestures. The more aware you become of yourself and others, the better you’ll do. Google and IMDB the people you are meeting. Look up PAL – playwrights and authors lab – it's a valuable resource.

If you’re meeting a quietly spoken person, speak quietly. You have to be aware of your physical presence and the impact it makes. Mirror your voice to the other person’s voice - where possible. If it’s going good, don’t bother with a second one. If first flops, try the second. It that tanks, ask if you can leave them a third. Try to leave on a positive note. [Don’t accept a cup of coffee – you’ll have enough stuff already]

CHARACTER GOALS: It has to be something absolutely clear – it has to be something they want, not something they need. Their goal is what they want – an active thing. Often the want versus need is shown by the personal and career ambitions on the heraldic shield you’ve created. The biggest obstacle character's have is usually an obstacle to achieving their professional goal.

Conflicts are usually described as: Inner [from within the central character]; Inter [from another character]; or Extra [everything the central character doesn’t have a personal relationship with]. Man versus himself, man versus man, man versus nature is another way of describing the three levels of conflict. JAWS: Sheriff scared of water, dodgy mayor, big shark! Give your characters physical, emotional or moral hell – ideally all three.

THEMES: Ask yourself - is it a big, important thing that resonates. I often pitch the theme first, to see if it resonates. People start making assumptions as soon as you start talking about theme and genre, that’s why you have to be able to nail that, to answer their questions. You’re not telling them the story – you’re laying out the eight pieces of the jigsaw, not all 500 pieces of the plot and stuff.

BIG THEMES; destructive love, unrequited love. You will have asked yourself all the questions they might ask. If they say it’s a bit like, say I see where you’re going but it’s also… If something is absolutely unique, it may not resonate at all. If the body language is going wrong and it seems too familiar to them, move on. Theme is about building the emotional spine and thematic integrity. Think of it in pictures, if possible.

You can pitch the elements from your Pitch Doc [PD] in whatever order you want, but keep it as simple as you can. Try doing a version of the PD for all the scripts you’ve already done. The biggest mistake most writers make is sending stuff out before its ready. The only script reading service AM recommends are:
The Script Factory and Script-a-Looza.

The good news is there are still plenty of regional funding schemes to get something made. You have to bombard them with new scripts, break them by attrition. Write constantly throughout the year, don’t wait for the deadline. Don’t just stick to Scotland – look at Screen East, Midlands, etc – approach a producer in that area to front for you. Don’t bother getting caught up in the politics.

AM’s agent says nobody wants to read new writers, except via agents and producers. You have to be focused and careful – you have got to get an agent. The climate for new writers has gotten tougher, the field has narrowed. Using tools like the Pitch Doc takes you a step up from other new writers. The best way to get an agent is via recommendation from an established writer. It’s all about establishing relationships.

Don’t say you’re a new writer – say you’re an Edinburgh-based writer, coming to London on business and looking to set up some meetings: I’d like to meet [insert name here] – can I send you a sample of my work? Even when you’ve been rejected, send them a card saying Thank You for the opportunity to meet and talk. There are certain companies that are better to approach then others, what broadcasters call ‘preferred suppliers’. Research who these are, ask around.

When you meet a writer or other working professional who may have useful information, ask if you can take them for coffee and pick their brains for 30 minutes. Turn up prepared with a list of questions and don’t overrun your allocated time. Chances are that after 30 minutes they’ll be happy to continue. You must build contacts. Any kind of track record is useful.

PITCHING TO MORE THAN ONE PERSON. Try using a pitch board: Large piece of hard cardboard, folded into three like a triptych. Put photos and images on the left panel. Put one-paragraph character profiles down the left of the middle panel, making each name big enough to be seen from distance. Then break the story down into scenes, running these in columns down the right hand side of the centre panel, and on down the right hand panel of the board.

This helps do your job for you, sucks people in to the narrative. If possible, bring photographs for people to hold. People will look at the pitch board instead of you. It’s great for a room of people. The Pitch Board fulfils the needs of visual, auditory and kinaesthetic people.

Why do new writers get rejected? Here are some of the most common mistakes: No Pitch Doc supplied with each script. A poorly written Pitch Doc is just as bad. Don’t ignore the guidelines – if they want 9 minute scripts, don’t send a 15-minuter. Read the small print of any competition or opportunity. Bad dialogue is fatal – read it out loud. Keep it simple, make sure you believe it. Don’t include camera angles or musical suggestions. Flashbacks, flash forwards, dream sequences – if you must use them, do it sparingly – but preferably not at all. Too many stage directions. Voiceover. No theme, or a theme that’s not big enough for the story. Hybrid loglines like ‘Jaws meets the Bicycle Thief!’

Bright lights, baked ziti

Back in 2001, The Sopranos was one of the hottest, most talked about drama shows on TV. It was winning awards, critical accolades and big audiences everywhere. Virgin Books asked me if I wanted to write an unofficial, unauthorised programme guide to the series. The publisher had struck gold with Keith Topping's guides to Buffy the Vampire Slayer and decided similar tomes could earn it even more. I happily signed on for the Sopranos, a show I was already watching avidly. At the time Season 3 was just starting in the US, so I arranged to have copies of each new episode sent to me on VHS. [Yes, 2001 was that long ago - before broadband, DVD recorders or bit torrents were commonplace.]

So I wrote fast and the book, Bright Lights, Baked Ziti: The Sopranos - An Unofficial and Unauthorised Programme Guide [boy, did it need a shorter, snappier title] was published in September 2001. Due to legal issues, somebody at Virgin bottled out of putting a Sopranos' star James Galdolfini on the cover. They'd plastered Buffy star Sarah Michelle Geller all over those books, but some genius decided differently for mine. Instead The Sopranos book featured a picture of a New York bridge. Yeah, like that'll attract buyers. Way to go.

Fast forward a few months and I get a message: Virgin has 8000 copies of the book in a warehouse somewhere, gathering dust. Did I want a few before they pulped the rest? So I bought a box of 50 for a fiver. Still got them somewhere, if they haven't been eaten by mice. In time I reclaimed the rights to my book from Virgin, fully intending to update the text and hawk it round other publishers. But more pressing priorities intervened, so I let it lie. Now The Sopranos are about to start their final series in America, and the penultimate series is getting a showing on Channel 4 in the UK. To mark the occasion, here's one of the essays I wrote for Bright Lights, Baked Ziti.

The Sopranos: Generation XXX

The Sopranos began life as a movie idea for creator David Chase. A veteran writer and executive producer for television series like The Rockford Files and Northern Exposure, Chase always wanted to write and direct feature films. Television was something he fell into while trying to break into movies.

The original story revolved around a mobster’s trouble relationship with his mother, a relationship so aggravating that it drives him into therapy. It had been inspired by Chase’s fractious relationship with his own mother. Chase proposed the story as a pilot and America’s Fox Network paid for a script to be developed. But Fox passed on the project when Chase finished his screenplay. The script was pitched to every major network in America and every one of them turned it down. This was undoubtedly frustrating at the time, but proved to be a godsend for the show. Enter Home Box Office, better known as HBO.

HBO is a cable network in the USA that commissions and broadcast original films and television series. Viewers have to pay for their cable connection, which restricts the potential audience. However, it enables HBO to screen programmes with extremely adult content – nudity and sexual scenes, graphic violence and profanity – and without breaks for commercials. Both these factors would be enable to break new ground for a US TV series.

HBO paid for the pilot episode to be shot, which Chase himself directed. Six months later HBO commissioned a further twelve episodes to create a three month long season of thirteen episodes. The Sopranos made its TV debut on January 10th, 1999. The impact was immediate and unprecedented for a series on HBO. Critics raved about the show, audience numbers began climbing rapidly and people began subscribing to HBO just to see what all the fuss was about. By the time the final episode of Season One screened on April 4th, The Sopranos was a smash hit – a cult had been born.

That cult soon became a phenomenon as the show was nominated for 16 Emmys – America’s most prestigious television industry award. The cast and crew attended the ceremony is a New Jersey bus but only took away two major awards. Edie Falco beat co-star Lorraine Bracco and three other nominees to win Best Actress in a Dramatic Series. The ‘College’ episode won for Best Writing in a Dramatic Series, but that was hardly a surprise. Four of the five scripts nominated were from Season One episodes, so the law of averages dictated The Sopranos virtually had to win that category.

The Sopranos went on to win almost every other award it was eligible for, picking up trophies from the Screen Actors’ Guild, the Writer’s Guild and the Golden Globes. But its poor showing at the Emmys rankled with the cast and crew. The Sopranos was the first cable show ever nominated for Best Dramatic Series and everyone thought it the clear favourite to win. Instead, the award went to The Practice, a series about a law firm from the creator of Ally McBeal.

Despite the Emmy snub, the impact of The Sopranos was enormous. Within weeks of its broadcast, real life gangsters were recorded by law enforcement authorities talking about the show and comparing themselves to its characters. One of the major networks approached the programme makers to see if a sanitised version could be created for mainstream broadcast – they politely refused. For HBO, the show was a massive boost. By the time the second season began in January 2000, people were having cable television connected to their homes just to watch The Sopranos. The show dominated magazine covers on newsstands. The final episode of Season Two attracted more than nine million viewers, the largest ever audience for a drama broadcast on cable television. The premiere of Season Three broke that record, with an audience of more than 11 million people. It got a larger audience than shows screening at the same time on some of the major networks, despite the fact they reach four times at many homes in America.

In Canada, the CTV network aired uncut reruns of Season One against a rival channel’s coverage of the 2000 Sydney Olympics and won the ratings battle every night. It also bested other popular US TV series like Ally McBeal and The West Wing. The screenings sparked a national debate about sex, violence and swearing on Canadian television.

When The Sopranos held an open casting call for extras in Harrison, New Jersey, the organisers expected between 500 and 1000 people. In fact the event attracted more than 14,000 hopefuls – effectively doubling the small town’s population for one day. More than 150 police had to be called in from neighbouring towns and cities to sort out the chaos.

But what makes the series so significant and its followers so fervent? A major factor must be the level of reality it brings to its subject. In a society stricken with angst over the collapse of the family unit and the loss of traditional values, The Sopranos addresses those same problems in the context of compelling drama. People’s lives are fracturing into two halves – your family life, and your life at work. Most people find themselves spending more time with their work colleagues than they do with their families. For Tony Soprano, this conflict is heightened by the conflict of his family versus his Family. As the show’s publicity material suggests, if one doesn’t kill him, the other will. That’s what a murderer has to go into therapy. It’s a sad commentary on life in America where a mobster needs the help of psychiatry to cope with the stresses and strains of modern society.

The Sopranos seems real because it is able to break the rules which bind other television dramas. The characters swear and have sex like real people. No major network show could ever contemplate having a strip club like the Bada Bing as a central locale. America is a violent society where gun ownership is a right enshrined in the Constitution – yet this is rarely reflected on television screens. The Sopranos pulls no punches in holding a mirror up to the bloody face of a culture where a million children take guns to school with them.

Thanks to HBO’s respect for the programme makers’ wishes, The Sopranos does not suffer from the supermodel syndrome visible in most television shows. Unlike them, The Sopranos is not populated by a cast of beautiful people with perfect teeth, narrow waists and pouting breasts. Instead, characters are played by men with paunches, women with wrinkles and children who don’t conform to some impossible stereotype.

The lack of commercials in The Sopranos gave its creators the chance to pace the show entirely at their own discretion. A one-hour drama on the major networks has to be written and produced in four acts, to accommodate breaks for adverts. This creates an article structure requiring the creation of several cliffhangers within each episode to keep the audience watching. The Sopranos has the luxury of ignoring that stricture. Viewers outside the USA do have the episodes interrupted by commercial breaks, but it is a sign of The Sopranos’ quality that this does not lessen the show’s impact.

Episodes can be given whatever pace the makers want. In interviews Chase says his creation is actually much slower than network series, but this has the effect of making what happens all the more absorbing. The show also doesn’t feel obliged to explain itself for some imaginary viewer with lowest common denominator intelligence. Most TV shows tell you something is going to happen, show it to you and then tell you what just happened afterwards. The Sopranos doesn’t bother. Even its dream sequences are oblique slices of surrealism which mostly go unexplained, rather than trite devices used by lazy writers to infodump crucial plot information at the audience.

The use of music in The Sopranos is another area where its embrace of reality will have a major impact in the way television dramas are made. Conventional dramas have an especially composed score that swells and surges at appropriate moments to prompt the audience into an emotional response. The Sopranos uses real songs, carefully chosen to complement or comment on its action. Securing the rights to broadcast this songs is far more expensive than having incidental music written to order, but Chase insisted this money be factored into the budgets for the show and HBO agreed.

Clashes between Chase and HBO are rare, but two examples of the cable channel behaving like a normal network have been reported. When the series was in development, HBO objected to its name. The executives thought viewers would be turned off by the title, perhaps thinking it was a drama about high voice classical singers. HBO suggested Family Man instead. Chase and company objected right back and dozens of potential names flew around. The matter was finally settled when Fox, the network which first got the show rolling, launched a series called Family Guy. That killed HBO’s suggestion and The Sopranos became the permanent title.

The other clash was over the award-winning ‘College’ episode. During that instalment Tony sees a mobster who turned rat for the FBI. He tracks the informant down and murders him – the first time in the series Tony is seen killing someone. HBO objected because the series had spent five episodes establishing an audience empathy with the mobster. If he murdered someone, that empathy could be fatally eroded. Chase stood his ground, saying that if Tony did not kill the rat it would alienate the viewers. Chase won the argument and the result won an Emmy award for outstanding writing. Since that incident, HBO seems to have kept its opinions to itself.

Films of Michael Caine #72: Shiner

Cast: Michael Caine (Billy ‘Shiner’ Simpson), Martin Landau (Frank Spedding), Frances Barber (Georgie), Frank Harper (Stoney), Andy Serkis (Mel), Danny Webb (Karl), Claire Rushbrook (Ruth), Matthew Marsden (Golden Boy), Kenneth Cranham (Gibson), David Kennedy (Chris), Peter Wright (D I Grant), Nicola Walker (D S Garland).

Crew: John Irvin (director), Jim Reeve and Geoff Reeve (producers), Scott Cherry (writer), Paul Grabowsky (music), Mike Molloy (cinematography), Ian Crafford (editor), Austen Spriggs (production designer).

Synopsis: Small-time boxing promoter Billy ‘Shiner’ Simpson is staging the biggest fight of his life. His son, Golden Boy, is contesting a world title at the York Hall in East London. Shiner accuses an old associate, Gibson, of skimming money from the event. Shiner has his two musclemen, Stoney and Mel, give Gibson a punishment beating. Golden Boy is nervous about the fight, but his father tries to boost his spirits. Police detectives want to arrest Shiner on suspicion of organising illegal fights. Such a bout left one fighter in a coma for 18 months and has now died.

Shiner persuades the police to arrest him after the title fight. After 30 years of struggle, Shiner has everything riding on Golden Boy. But his son loses in the second round. Shiner accuses Golden Boy of throwing the bout. The boxer is shot and killed by an unseen gunman. Shiner believes there is a conspiracy against him. He charges around London, trying to find those responsible. Finally, Shiner is summoned to the roof of the boxing venue to face the gunman. It’s Gibson – he was trying to shoot Shiner, not Golden Boy. Gibson, Stoney and Shiner all die in a bloody shootout…

++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Caine and British film producer Geoffrey Reeve had been frequent collaborators, working together on Half Moon Street, The Whistle Blower (both 1986) and Shadow Run (1998). In 1999 they conceived the idea for a modern reworking of William Shakespeare’s tragedy King Lear, relocating the basic story to the world of prize fighting with Caine as the Lear-esque patriarch. ‘I thought it’s the nearest I’m ever gonna get to play it, so I’m gonna do it,’ the actor told The Times in 2001. Scott Cherry was hired to turn the concept into a screenplay, with John Irvin attached to direct.

The $10 million production began shooting at locations around London in January 2000. York Hall in Tower Hamlets was used as the fight venue, having been home to boxing matches in the East End for decades. To add verisimilitude a dozen great British boxers from the past 50 years joined the cast, sitting ringside during the fight. In 2001 Caine told the Big Issue that making the film was like going home: ‘I’d never shot such a Cockney picture, in which every person has a Cockney accent. It was quite extraordinary. I’ve known so many characters and stories like Shiner. I’ve been to those boxing places. My dad used to take me to Manor Place Baths in Southwark, and in the film there are boxers I know from that time who’d fought in Bethnal Green.’

Caine was suffering from arthritis in his hands during filming. That made shooting a scene where his character repeatedly punched a mirror particularly painful, but the actor said the entire role was just as tough. ‘Playing a role so emotional was quite heart-wrenching and exhausting, but that’s what I want to do now. As you get older, you look for characters that are more interesting. To see someone disintegrate is, although sad, very interesting to play. And as you begin to get older you begin to fall apart yourself.’

He rejected any suggestion that Shiner was just another British gangster movie, following on from the success of Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (1998). ‘I’ve been an actor for 40 years and this is my third gangster movie,’ Caine told Empire in 2001. ‘I did Mona Lisa (1986), Get Carter (1971) and this. So I’m not exactly trying to corner the market on gangster movies here.’

The film got its world premiere out of competition at the San Sebastian Film Festival in September 2000, where Caine received a career achievement award. It didn’t reach British cinemas for another year, when it was rated 18. Critics praised Caine’s performance but felt the movie was nothing special. The picture attracted controversy for a scene where Caine’s character holds a gun against a pregnant woman’s stomach. A pressure group called Mediawatch-UK described the sequence as scandalous and unforgivable. The film got a brief theatrical release, grossing just over $50,000. Shiner was more successful in Spanish cinemas, taking nearly $250,000.

The picture was released on DVD and VHS in Britain during 2002. US distributor Miramax had acquired North American rights to the feature in February 2001 but held it back for 18 months before releasing it on DVD, rated R.

Reviews: ‘Michael Caine is in fine form … the veteran actor remains compelling even as this somewhat hackneyed melodrama becomes increasingly overwrought.’ – Variety
‘Caine adds a bit of class to a stodgy crime flick … great performance, forgettable feature.’ – Empire

Verdict: Shiner may have drawn its inspiration from Shakespeare’s King Lear, but the link is decidedly tenuous. Most of this film’s problems stem from a script that tries too hard to out-think the audience. The ‘who shot Golden Boy’ conspiracy is a massive misdirection that leaves you frustrated and underwhelmed when the shooter’s identity is finally revealed. It’s a shame about the fumbled ending, as Shiner has much to recommend it. The film looks great, features an evocative Grabowsky score and a towering performance from Caine. He wrings every ounce of emotion from the material without ever going over the top. The supporting cast is strong too, especially Shiner’s two henchman, played by Frank Harper and Andy Serkis (Gollum in The Lord of the Rings trilogy (2001-2003)). It’s just the flaws in the script that down-grade a potentially strong picture. There’s nothing you haven’t seen before in Shiner.